Lecture room: Árnagarður – 304. Click for a map.
Working institution
Theodór Francis Birgisson is a clinical social worker running his own firm – LAUSNIN family center – where family issues are dealt with on a broad spectrum.
Abstract
In this workshop Theodór describes his use of emotionsional focused therapy (EFT) in his therapeutic work and he mainly works with couples and families. What usually causes quarrels between two or more parties is that people don’t understand each other. It is common that A is saying something but B is hearing something completely different. When working with that issue the therapist needs to create a safe place for all parties in such a way that everyone can have a voice and communicate their true intention. It is then important to speak with everyone to find out their disposition and feelings towards the other party or individual. Negative feelings that are fuelled by the issue often overshadow real and positive feelings toward the other person. If one can help all the quarrellers to sense positive feelings toward each other reconciliation becomes possible. A therapist must watch out for signs that the quarrellers are interpreting negative feelings due to old pains and are therefore in regression. If that is the case, the therapist needs to help the individual to heal the old wounds and differentiate that pain from the pain that is currently being dealt with. The only way to deal with old pain is to go into the feelings that dwell beneath it and rewrite that history. It is important that after the reconciliation nobody feels they have won or lost the case and everyone can be at ease